A Note: To be honest with you, baby reader, I wasn’t abiding how to address this article. There were so abounding apparatus I capital to accommodate – A analysis of the show, a arbitrary of the songs, my acknowledgment overall, and of course, the account I had done with AJ Holmes. One abstraction was to aloof address about my acquaintance at the show. Addition was to cull a Harry Potter and achieve this a two-parter, extenuative the account for addition day. But I absitively that I was activity to chase in the footsteps of AJ himself and air out my animosity in a accessible forum, warts and all. So yes, this commodity will be a bit best than my accepted ones, but I achievement you adore it. I absolutely enjoyed autograph it.
Back in September, I saw an advertisement on amusing media that AJ Holmes (apologies, Broadway’s AJ Holmes) would be assuming a abandoned appearance at the SoHo Playhouse. According to the blurb I read, Yeah, But Not Appropriate Now was AJ’s attack to “move accomplished his crippling charge for affiliated validation . . . in advanced of an audience,” answering the catechism of whether he has anytime absolutely been himself. As an adherent of AJ’s assignment who had some time to annihilate afterwards chic one night, I absitively to pay the appearance a visit. Afterwards all, the show’s blurb claimed that I was activity to be audition about “the worst, best embarrassing, humiliating, potentially irredeemable parts” of addition I had been a fan of for abounding years – Who wouldn’t appetite to see article like that? But as I took the alms bottomward to the theater, I couldn’t admonition but admiration what AJ was activity to allocution about. What had he done? Would I still adore him afterwards the appearance had ended? Who absolutely was AJ Holmes?
For those alien with AJ, he co-composed music for the hit Starkid appearance A Actual Potter Agreeable as able-bodied as added Starkid productions like Me and My Dick, A Actual Potter Chief Year, and Twisted: The Untold Adventure of a Royal Vizier. You additionally ability bethink him from the Gilderoy Lockhart Mouse Prince monologue, a moment of theatre history that will abode me and abounding others for the blow of our lives. But added than that one moment, best theatre admirers apperceive him for his absurd music, decidedly songs like “A Thousand and One Nights” and “If I Believed” from Twisted. Starkid admirers acquiescently accredit to him as “Musical Daddy AJ,” a appellation apropos to his agreeable aptitude and leadership. He has additionally played Elder Cunningham in The Book of Mormon on Broadway, the West End, and in places about the US and Australia.
To me, AJ Holmes had consistently been a bit of a abstruseness – He was accomplished and funny, but it was difficult to acquisition abandoned agreeable from addition who tended to be assuming as a affiliate of a accumulation (one accumulation of his abandoned performances refers to him as “criminally underrated”). Seeing Yeah, But Not Appropriate Now would be my befalling to see AJ’s achievement while additionally accepting a bigger compassionate of who he was as a person, alike if it was aloof his date persona. So you could say that I went into the appearance attractive to break a abstruseness that promised to be apparent in an hour.
The SoHo Playhouse is a baby amphitheater with seats activity anon up to the date – In the advanced row, I acquainted as if I was about onstage myself! Fortunately, this affectionate area is absolute for Yeah, But Not Appropriate Now. It allows the absolute admirers to see AJ’s affections as he tells his adventure through song. There are additionally some opportunities for alternation that wouldn’t acquire been accessible in a beyond theater. There’s additionally a admirable little bar bench area you can grab a alcohol afore or afterwards the show, adequate and chatting with adolescent admirers members.
I won’t go into too abounding spoilers, as I appetite anybody to acquire the adventitious to see this achievement afterwards animate everything, but I will allotment some of the moments that acquire ashore with me. My actual anticipation afterwards the appearance accomplished – Is it accessible to be addicted of addition you don’t know? Because that’s how I felt. I had gone on an affecting adventure with addition who had amorphous his appearance with a arrogant attitude and concluded with raw lyrics that abashed the admirers into silence. Aural an hour I went from bedlam at jokes about his mother and Facebook to artlessly watch addition allotment one of the everyman moments of their activity on stage.
Some accurate standout songs accommodate “Yeah, But Not Appropriate Now,” “I Could Be That Guy,” and “Perfect Fantasy,” songs with actual altered tones that appearance off both AJ’s agreeable accomplishment and his affecting range. My accurate admired was “Fuckboi,” a song about self-awareness with an absurd key change that had me headbanging alike as a man was confessing to actuality a fuckboi. He additionally uses the Rodgers & Hammerstein song “Oh, What a Admirable Morning” as a way to accurate not alone the face he puts on for the apple but the way he feels inside. The callbacks throughout the appearance are able and never feel forced.
From the moment he starts speaking, AJ has ascendancy of his audience. He knows what they appetite to apprehend and gives them that, forth with some abrupt parts. Back talking about the appearance with my accompany who hadn’t apparent it, I begin myself adage “It’s like Bo Burnham with the singing and instruments, but different. I’m not abiding how to call it, but different.” Indeed, AJ’s appearance has a alluring activity to it that I couldn’t absolutely place, alike now, weeks afterwards seeing the achievement for the aboriginal time.
AJ Holmes, Broadway or not, is a star. His agreeable talents are absolutely batty and will leave you in awe, abnormally back loops are involved. But it isn’t aloof his aptitude that makes him angle out. No, there’s article more, and that is the joy on his face back performing. I begin myself animated forth with him as he got into the music, comatose forth to the beat and assuming a authentic adulation and adherence to his work. It’s attenuate to see addition so foolishly blithesome and accomplished at the aforementioned time and I cannot delay to see added of his assignment in the future.
So ultimately, the abstruseness was solved. AJ Holmes is “authentically performative,” a man who feels at home on date and expresses himself through song. He has done some things that may not anytime be forgiven, but he acknowledges his mistakes and tries to abide accurate to himself, never aggravating to get the admirers to appearance him as the absolute person. Yeah, But Not Appropriate Now isn’t a appearance about a absolute catastrophe – It’s all about progress. You may not be absolutely the guy you appetite to be, but you are still yourself, and that’s all you charge to be. As AJ says, “We’re accepting closer.”
After seeing the show, I had the befalling to account AJ Holmes and altercate what it’s been like to achieve such a absolute abandoned show.
Kat: So how did you adjudge you capital to do a abandoned show?
AJ: Well, afterwards I was done with Book of Mormon, a big-budget bartering musical, I capital to do the absolute adverse of that. I grew up with agreeable amphitheater – That’s my audience, that’s the bulk of my being. But I’ve additionally admired ball my accomplished activity and consistently capital to acquire time to go into that ancillary of things, but my career aloof went a altered way. And so I capital to analysis the amnion to see if I could drudge it – I ample I shouldn’t let any added time go by afore I started aggravating to put on my own specials. It was mainly apprenticed by the admiration to achieve article on my own afterwards accomplishing added people’s words, choreography, instructions, and block scheduling. I can change it every night.
Kat: You mentioned Broadway – What acquire been some differences amid places you’ve performed including Broadway, Australia, and the West End?
AJ: Assertive things like audiences are a little new – They beam at altered jokes in altered countries. Theaters ambit from arenaceous old places to ones that feel actual old-timey and admirable and ornate. There acquire been casinos in Vegas that are way glossier. The Sydney Lyric Theatre is affiliated to a bank in Sydney, it’s one of their bigger theaters over there. You don’t anytime acquire to airing through the bank to get to the amphitheater but on aliment break we did! But back it’s a bartering appearance like Book of Mormon, they try to accumulate as abundant the aforementioned as possible. Aforementioned backstage, aforementioned chantry on the signs, aforementioned arrows pointing artists to bathrobe rooms. Every time you aloof acquisition your way about – They achieve it amateur foolproof. Not accessible to do. Management shows up in advanced and aloof lays it all out for you. So you can chase your aisle and break on track. And back you’re accomplishing eight shows a week, that’s all you absolutely acquire the brainy amplitude to do – Eliminate aggregate abroad and aloof do things. Bodies consistently ask on bout things like “Did you adore seeing San Jose?” No, No, I didn’t. What do you anticipate I’m doing? It’s aloof like all about that one affair and afresh you’re beat so you acquire some drinks and adhere out afterwards the show. Afresh you’re in bed until one and afresh you got to acquisition a way to accord yourself sustenance and get accessible to do it again.
Kat: How did actuality in Starkid admonition you advance as a artist and performer?
AJ: In so abounding ways, it was aloof accepting to assignment with all those accomplished people. And they were my peers! It showed us that we could achieve things calm – We didn’t charge anyone’s permission to do it. And we absolutely had the accomplishment set all-important to achieve air-conditioned being appropriate area we were as students. I anticipate there’s so abundant gatekeeping from bodies in the industry that are cogent you that you acquire to do things a assertive way. And it [Starkid] showed me appropriate off the bat that you ability apperceive a bigger way because you’re advantageous added attention. It accomplished me the accent of accord – Back you acquire a aggregate vision, and you’re absolutely amorous about something, things get way easier. You’re either authoritative or you’re crumbling time.
Kat: Acquire you begin it easier to co-compose or compose by yourself?
AJ: Depends on the song! There were songs in this appearance that I wrote with Caitlin Cook, my director, we’re in a agreeable ball duo, Two-Thirds of a Threesome. We acquire account shows at Littlefield alleged “Fake Birthday”. We address a lot of songs calm and I’ve admired that collaboration. She helps me booty a lot of burden off of myself in the autograph action – I feel a lot added permission to aloof be asinine and free. And she’ll go with things that I would never acquire in my own head. It can be cool helpful. There were songs in this appearance that we were animate on, like, “I Can Be That Guy,” which is a new song for this abundance of the show. It’s a actual claimed song. We were starting to address it as we usually address songs together, but afresh I accomplished I was accepting attrition to her dispatch in and aggravating to address it in the moment with me. I chose to be like, “Hey, I would like to abutment on this, but I would like if you could abutment my claimed writing.” It aloof acquainted that way on that song. And she was abundant at that – We talked and antiseptic how we were activity to do it. I anticipate so abundant for me is acquirements to acquire to that little articulation inside, because I don’t appetite to aching her feelings. What does the song want? It’s absolutely acceptance that attrition to exist. I’ve begin myself giving myself a adamantine time for my action in the past. I’m cutting myself in the bottom because I wasn’t autograph in the way I capital to write.
Kat: How did you appear up with a abstraction for Yeah, But Not Appropriate Now?
AJ: The abstraction of a appearance that started with a title. “Yeah, but not appropriate now” was article that Stephen Sondheim said. I got to go to the 75th altogether ceremony of his at the Hollywood Bowl back I was in aerial school. I was a huge Sondheim nerd, still am. So I got to go sit in the advanced amphitheater of the Hollywood Bowl during the day back they were accomplishing all the rehearsals. So I’m sitting there with Len Cariou, Jason Alexander, Angela Lansbury, Bernadette Peters, and Stephen Sondheim. And, of course, I’m too chickenshit to allocution to him [Sondheim]. I delay all afternoon and appropriate afore we’re about to leave, I go up to him and ask if I could a account with him. He was about to airing up on the date and accord some addendum so he looked at me and said, “Yeah, but not appropriate now”. And afresh he absolved on date and I had to leave. So I never got that picture.
I accomplished accomplishing Mormon and I was talking to my acquaintance Zach Zucker, who does Edinburgh Fringe every year and has a assembly aggregation alleged Stamptown Comedy. I didn’t apperceive what to do afterwards Mormon. I’m absolutely cerebration of accomplishing article on my own – I appetite to feel like I can angle on my own two legs and not coact for a minute. I’d collaborated with so abounding bodies and had this dent on my shoulder. I bare to apperceive that I can do it on my own. Of course, what I ample out is that I charge to coact or I’m asleep in the water. But at the time, that’s what I thought. And so he was like, “Well, why don’t you do a appearance in Edinburgh? Please let me aftermath you”. I was like, “Okay”. And it was as simple as that – An Instagram DM conversation. Afresh he was like, ” I’m casting your show, what’s it called?” So I anticipation about it. And I anticipation that it [Yeah, But Not Appropriate Now] was a funny title. And afresh suddenly, I’m accomplishing interviews for my PR aggregation about the show, which of course, doesn’t exist. It’s not categorical – I acquire no abstraction what it is. And afresh I had to get complex with addition project, Starkid Homecoming, a big ceremony concert appropriate afore Edinburgh. It was the accurate day afore I flew to Edinburgh.
I was aggravating to address my appearance for months beforehand, but I got austere writer’s block and it was authoritative me actual sad. So I absitively I would stop accomplishing it. Back I started “Homecoming” I adherent my abounding cocky to that because it was huge – I was actual appreciative of that. And afresh the abutting day I got to Scotland and started affair all these added bodies who are accomplishing shows there. I accomplished they were all actual appreciative of their show, which they’ve all done abounding times, or acquire been animate on them for abounding months or years. And I acquainted like a bit of a douchebag for assuming up afterwards a show. So I had four hours to do a tech rehearsal. And I didn’t acquire a show! I aloof flew out all these awe-inspiring instruments thinking, “Well, at atomic if I acquire all these instruments, I can do like bristles account here, bristles account there. I can ample the time somehow!” I was planning on improvising a show. And afresh luckily I met Michaella Drummond from the Stamptown assembly aggregation and we were talking about my show. She had a absolutely bright appearance of it actual bound and I affiliated with her absolutely deeply. And I asked her to be my administrator and she said yes, so we backward up for like, the abutting three nights. With Michaella’s help, I wrote three songs in a night. I begin some added songs I had accounting for added projects that I managed to incorporate, and we put a agglomeration of Post-It addendum up on the bank and begin a through-line. And afresh over the advanced of the aboriginal ceremony of shows, anytime I got a laugh, we’d put that antic in – It’s never leaving. By the end of the month, it was okay. It wasn’t acceptable – It was okay. And afresh we took it to Adelaide Fringe and it got a little better. And Caitlin’s administering now because Michaella is off in Scotland. Caitlin, Craig Bundy (our complete designer), and I all got COVID together. So we were all abandoned central my accommodation for two weeks, and afresh we absolutely absurd the appearance accessible and wrote a brace of new songs. We fabricated it the affair that it consistently capital to be. You gotta acquisition the positive, assorted positives. Not fun, by the way – I was actual sick. But the assignment had to continue. We had a deadline, you know?
Kat: Several people, including yourself, acquire acclaimed similarities amid you and Bo Burnham. What makes you different?
AJ: I anticipate anyone who does agreeable ball gets the Bo Burnham comparison. And it’s funny because bodies afore him apparently would get the Tim Minchin comparison, and afore him, bodies would get the Victor Borge comparison. It’s this adulterated brand that bodies don’t apperceive exists. But I’m animated it’s Bo these days, because he’s so talented. I’ve had the songs from Central ashore in my arch for months. And the dude has been animate adamantine back he was like, 13 authoritative this being happen. I angle on his shoulders, alike admitting he’s a few months adolescent than me. I anticipate our tones are appealing different. I get depressed, but he leans into that and takes us to addition level. I don’t do as abounding suicide jokes – Not that I’m accustomed from the casual suicide joke. And I ambition I wrote a lot of things he wrote! But he has a edgeless bluntness and a “grounded darkness” that he’s inhabited for a continued while. And I’ve been on the added end of the emotional. But it’s agnate at its core. I don’t know. But my accomplished accord is that I baby to your acumen of what you appetite me to be. And Bo seems like he’s consistently had a able faculty of “This is me and fuck you if you don’t get it,” which I admire. I appetite to get that too. And back he talks about the audience, with the “Part of me loves you, allotment of me hates you,” I chronicle to that accomplished thing. But I don’t know. We’re both white bodies with the piano singing asinine lyrics and aweless shit. So I can’t say we’re too far apart. But tonally, we feel different. I’m not abiding – I leave it to added bodies to dissect.
Kat: So what fabricated you appetite to acknowledge so abundant about your life?
AJ: Acceptable question. It’s a difficult affair to do.
Kat: I can imagine.
AJ: Yeah. And some ability say unnecessary. Certainly, my parents! I see in their eyes that they may backpack that opinion, but loving, admiring parents that they are, they wouldn’t acquaint me. But their abutment is unwavering. I’ve consistently been an oversharer. I anticipate bodies are absolutely abashed to say what’s activity on with them. It makes things taboo, and abashment absolutely has bedeviled years of my life. So if I can overshare, I assumption I aloof don’t put too aerial a exceptional on authoritative bodies afflictive with that. If you’re afflictive with my show, you can leave! And afresh if you’re not, hopefully, you’re addition who’s like, “Oh, I didn’t apperceive we were accustomed to say bits like this”. It’s aggravating to afford some ablaze on that affectionate of thing. A lot of art is aggravating to do that. We all backpack black – The point is not to run abroad from it. It’s to acquire it, right? I’m aggravating to own it, not disregard it. I anticipate I acquire this actual squeaky-clean acumen in the bound bulk of acclaim that I acquire in the accessible eye.
Kat: Not gonna lie, I was a little bit shocked.
AJ: Yeah. It’s like John Mulaney in a way because anybody is so abashed by the actuality that he went to adjust alike admitting it was accessible ability for a continued time that he was a biologic user and an addict. I anticipate absorbing bodies get absent in all sorts of shit. And aloof acquire what my own bend of abashment looked like and I’m aggravating to flash a ablaze on it, like “Here’s all of it! Here’s the cringe!” It existed and I’m award a way to be acquire with it. You don’t acquire to be ashamed. It’s to admonition added bodies amount out that they can do that for themselves.
Kat: Back you’re administration your story, is it added a admiration to affix or a admiration to be heard?
AJ: Oh God, absolutely both. As I say in the show, “I’m the one with the microphone”. So in that moment it’s to be heard, afresh afterwards the show, I like to connect. But it’s absolutely both – I anticipate you can’t acquire one afterwards the other, honestly. So generally we don’t feel heard in best conversations. How do we acquisition a way to both feel heard? Sometimes I acquisition myself aloof repeating the things my accompany acquire said, because I can acquaint they don’t anticipate I’ve heard it. Like, “Alright, I’m gonna achieve abiding you apperceive that I acquire heard you. But I additionally acquire ADD, so you’re apparently not convinced”.
Kat: Do you acquire a admired song from Yeah, But Not Appropriate Now?
AJ: Apparently “I Can Be That Guy,” the new one. I feel like it was accessible to appear out back it did, and it feels like my calling agenda now. You can get a solid abstraction of who I am aloof from that song. It can be absolutely “Show Boaty”, self-aware, and atoning all in the aforementioned four-minute tune.
Kat: Was it difficult to appear up with the looping tracks?
AJ: Yeah, that took a lot of practice. Aloof repeating it over and over and over. Because if you blend it up a little bit, there’s no bang clue or annihilation to admonition at all. It’s aloof in the moment.
Kat: I was analytical as to why you focus on “Broadway’s AJ Holmes,” article you say a lot in the show. What aggressive you to do that?
AJ: Well, we aloof kept bedlam about it and it aloof showed up over and over. Alike admitting I was in Mormon for bristles and a bisected years, best of it was on tour. Yes, I was on Broadway, but I was a standby for Ben Platt and that was alone six months. I alone got to do that role a scattering of times aural those six months. I don’t absolutely acquire any appropriate to say that I’m “Broadway’s”. But that’s why we acquisition it funny! I’m such this Broadway nerd, and I can acquaint you about Sondheim for hours. That’s my affection and yet not absolutely my career. But I’m not absolutely aggravating to ascend that acropolis as abundant as the ball acropolis and autograph my own stuff. So we aloof went spiral it. You apperceive what? I’ve been on Broadway! What’s endlessly me? And what’s abundant is accepted publications acquire referred to me as “Broadway’s AJ Holmes”.
Kat: You’re ashore with it now.
AJ: It’s fantastic. I acquire no affirmation to it at all and but you know, PR is a admirable thing. In the show, we achieve the antic that I accurately afflicted my aboriginal name to Broadway. And some publications and radio shows acquire actually said, “I heard he afflicted his name to Broadway! Don’t apperceive what that’s about.”
Kat: Some lightning annular questions! Admired musical?
AJ: Sweeney Todd!
Kat: Admired appearance and song from Sweeney Todd?
AJ: Sweeney and “Epiphany”. I got to do that appearance in my chief year of aerial school. It was one of those moments area I bethink watching on VHS and singing forth and afresh attractive at myself like, “Whoa, you’ve got some ability dude! You could maybe do this one day.” So the dream is alive.
Kat: So is Sweeney your dream role?
AJ: Yeah. I’d adulation to do it [the role] as an adult. And also, George in Sunday in the Park with George is my added dream role for sure.
Kat: Is there any appearance that you’re attractive advanced to seeing?
AJ: I appetite to go see American Utopia afresh because that affair was so good. It’s one of the greatest nights I’ve anytime had. It was aloof absurd musicianship and songwriting. I mean, David Burton is incredible. I additionally appetite to see Appear From Abroad – I’ve never apparent that. As anon as I acquire some time afterwards all I’m gonna go stop by there.
Kat: One chat to call your show?
AJ: Therapy. Or performative analysis if I can use two words.
Kat: And final question. Do you acquire any admonition for actors and performers?
AJ: Yes. Create – Achieve your own things and don’t wait. Don’t let bodies acquaint you to wait. And don’t be beat if and back it’s shitty. I should apparently booty my own admonition alike at this level, there are things that I’m disturbing – Disturbing to acquisition its audience, disturbing in the time of COVID, it’s all struggling. But it’s the best that I can achieve appropriate now. And I get to be appreciative of that. And I am appreciative of that. Whether you’re authoritative blogs, podcasts, YouTube videos, or whatever it is, do it with joy. Get it seen, get it read, put it up on its feet. Alike with a $2 budget, it’s bigger to do article than annihilation and things advance to added things. You prove to the apple that you’re austere by accomplishing it. I’ve ashen so abundant time aloof waiting. If you acquire 10 account to jot bottomward an idea, alpha account it bottomward in real-time throughout the day. It’s like animadversion for gold and communicable whatever you catch. Or like collywobbles – Be accessible with your net to bolt them. Acquisition a way to adulation yourself and bolt a butterfly.
Yeah, But Not Appropriate Now has its final performances this weekend at the SoHo Playhouse. You can acquirement tickets here. A appropriate acknowledge you to AJ Holmes for the admirable interview!
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