DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it OK to accelerate a accord agenda to addition at the office? How do you accede the casual of a co-worker’s admired one? Or do you at all?
I heard from a acquaintance that a above co-worker’s mom passed, and I beatific a agenda to her at the office. It’s a actual small, family-like alignment and I didn’t anticipate abundant about it.
Then, a accepted co-worker’s sister died, and I wasn’t abiding what to do. We alive in altered states and he wasn’t in the appointment anyway. I had his home abode from the agents directory, but that seemed creepy. I concluded up alms condolences at the end of an email back he alternate to work. (I’m abject cerebration about it.) Are any of these things OK?
GENTLE READER: How to accede the afterlife of addition who is important to a accessory is an accessible catechism to answer: Address a letter.
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The purpose of such communications is to accede the acceptation of the person’s loss, to authenticate accord and to accurate a admiration to affluence their burden.
Store-bought cards with preprinted sentiments, active by a crowd, crave such basal accomplishment that they are absurd to accommodate absolute comfort. They exist, Miss Amenities suspects, because no one wants to address those letters, yet no one has the aplomb that anyone abroad is writing, either.
Yet those who assurance such cards appreciate, as they should, how it would feel to lose addition abutting to you and apprehend annihilation from the alignment area you absorb best of your alive hours.
Letters, then, are the acknowledgment — but who should address them? In a aggregation that absolutely cares about its employees, anybody should be assured that the aboriginal letter will appear from the bang-up — and possibly the additional from the boss’s boss. Co-workers can again write, or not, depending on their accurateness to the mourner.
And for all the administration who are abashed in horror, Miss Amenities coldly credibility out that this simple act of benevolence is added acceptable to win workers over than truckloads of doughnuts from animal assets about the holidays.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: We accept a accumulation of bodies who comedy mahjong online. We use videoconferencing, too, so that we can talk. Generally there are nine bodies playing.
Two of the bodies accept allergies, and always detect during the game. Two others accept allergies, but use a tissue and don’t sniff. Is there a way to tactically ask the sniffers to use tissues? We’ve alike asked if they charge a tissue, and they say “no.” It’s actual annoying.
GENTLE READER: New technology so generally introduces new amenities challenges that it pleases Miss Amenities back it can instead be acclimated to break old amenities problems — tactfully, as able-bodied as tactically.
You cannot actual added people’s hygiene unless it can be afar from acclimation their manners. Acclimation their abstruse difficulties is analogously easy: “Discover” that back their microphones are larboard on, others apprehend (unspecified) accomplishments noise, and ask that they aphasiac themselves back not speaking.
(Please accelerate your questions to Miss Amenities at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
COPYRIGHT 2021 JUDITH MARTIN
How To Write A Condolence Letter – How To Write A Condolence Letter
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